I am suffering not just from frustration, but confusion. One minute my heart is not in it; the next minute my heart is. Right now, I am at a point that is more or less in limbo. It would be nice if my heart really was in it, but because of the condition of my heart, I just in a state of confusion. I did do some yard work, which is a bit of exercise, which it good for the mind. I realize that I finally found out how out of shape I am. I weigh over 300 lbs., so where do I begin in terms of exercising to get in shape. I often complain about having an out of shape body physically yet now I realize that I am out of shape mentally. I know that common sense tells me to do something about it, but there is something that tells me and asks me why I have I gotten lately? Where have I gone wrong? Why? I just don't know.
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